I Can’t Afford To Support My Daughter!

Dear Hillie:

I retired five years ago and life is not so easy financially for my wife and me as it used to be. We have one daughter aged 25 who we had late in life. She is a student and an unmarried mother and we have supported her up till now. However I don’t know how much longer I can go on doing this as I have already borrowed money against our assets and I only receive a small pension. Our daughter has never earned any money in her life and we are worried for her and our grandchild. How can we tell her how badly off we are at present?

Hillie says:

It’s not a question of how you tell your daughter but when! She has been extremely fortunate to have such kind and loving parents to support her financially and emotionally through college and motherhood. However it’s now time for her to accept responsibility for her own life and decisions. It won’t help any of you to make yourselves ill with worry so you must talk to her straight away. You can still help with childcare and babysitting but she must go to her local social security office and seek financial help. So long as you are always there for her with emotional and practical support, she will be fine.